she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
