Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
Randomize
