Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
