I'm so fucking centered right now
she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
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