Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
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