My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
We don't watch enough power rangers
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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