It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
you realize that if you hadn't mouthed "we're getting laid tonight", i wouldn't have woken up with your ex this morning. just sayin
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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