She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
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