i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
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