well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
23 Bisexuals Confess The Biggest Differences Between Dating People Of Each Sex
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
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My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid