ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How external is "for external use only"?
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
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