I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
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