A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
