yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
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