i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
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The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
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I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
i now understand why vodka
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to