im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
I take back everything I said about communal showers
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
Randomize
