I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
I have post one night stand depression
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize
