fml, blew my nose and red sprinkles came out and did the splits when i sneezed
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
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but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
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