i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
Randomize
