forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
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