i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
