i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So apparently the bar gave out free condoms, which I now have a pocket full of. Why is drunk me shoving the fact that I'm single and not getting laid in sober me's face...
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
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