Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
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