ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
Randomize
