Moan for me like Helen Keller
I wanna passion pit in your ass
loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
Randomize
