he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
I'm doing a half mile walk of shame carrying a trash bag and still very drunk. Save me. I feel like a refugee.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
when i woke up w mysterious sticky crap in my hair, i assumed i had another blackout hookup. nope. turns out i made PBJ and proceeded to pass out in it. i ate the evidence when i woke up.
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