my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
Are these your boobs on my camera?
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
Randomize
