I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
Operation Purity has been aborted
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
I talked a bachelorette party out of a 4 person bucket of long islands, and drank it by myself. Please call me a taxi. The fat brides maid just grabbed my cock
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
Randomize