Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
I sent out a mass text that said "margaritas for Jesus?" and nobody responded, worst Easter ever.
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
You left your underwear on the fireplace
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
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