She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
Do you know who changed all my phone contacts into characters from Harry Potter?
He Who Must Not Be Named.
Fuck you.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize