At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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