'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
Randomize
