Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
I'm drunk at a fancy martini bar, wearing jeans, drinking cheap vodka that I brought in my purse. Got thrown out of court for using my cell phone. All in all calling Thursday a success.
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
the raccoons are back...
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