My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
Randomize
