is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
Randomize
