***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
I just woke up in my closet, wearing a pink cowboy hat and a pink thong...
I want my thong back.
I hate you tequila.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
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