is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
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