also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
I'm in the grocery store cradling a box of wine like it's my firstborn, so of course this would be the first and only time I've ever seen my boss outside of the office.
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
Randomize
