the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
Randomize
