8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
One of my students in my 8am class brought me a Tim Hortons cup with a bloody Mary in it. Clearly, I didn't manage to look not drunk when I ran into him at Denny's at 4am. Who decided to let me teach?
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
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