love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
Randomize
