The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You passed out across the stairs with your feet and arms through the railings so you "wouldn't fall down when you blacked out and no one could get the pizza past you without waking you up". \n\nYou're the smartest drunk I know.
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
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