I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
Randomize