I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
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