he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
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