so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
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