omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
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