You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
I am one with the molecules
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
I need to align my fucking chakras
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
