drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
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