erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
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Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
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