i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Randomize
