You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
