Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
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