that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.